Solid perspective, when it comes to elementary aged kids who are in school, or older kids who don't need as much hands-on attention. But the very tendency to rush through work to move onto relaxation time makes me skeptical that men are better suited to care for infants and small children at home.
This is the masculine perspective you describe, as I've seen it in action with small children:
- Showing an 18 month old how to put on his own clothes is tedious. Easier for me to just get him dressed; he'll learn when he's bigger.
- Allowing a 6 month old to start feeding herself creates huge messes. I'll just hold her hands down and put these solids straight into her mouth until her motor control improves.
- Potty training is horrible. I'll change his diapers until he's ready to use the toilet on his own.
- I already told my two year old that we'll go to the park after naptime. Why's he asking again? He will receive a verbal update when the status changes; I'm busy gaming.
Small kids require huge amounts of time investment, and you can't rush through some of these tasks without deleterious long-term consequences. Language development in particular seems to be excruciatingly painful to a man who dislikes constant interruptions and repetitions. If your toddler has extensive exposure to older, speaker humans, then it's not a huge deal. However, if the stay-at-home parent is the primary source of language development, then in this instance, women's neurotic tendencies (as you called them) are superior.
"Dads have it easier at home. Moms have it easier in the office."
Anything to break the relational bonds that keep human beings from evolving into industrial scale widgets. Consider digging into the educational project. Starting source: the book review of a (then) new ELA textbook by C.S. Lewis, and the history notes in The Yardsale of tge Mind Blog.
Practically, in the office men have both accountability and responsibility, women not so much. The reverse is true at home.
In both cases we lack virtuous male leadership, and capable female submission. Both are a lot harder from the inside than they look from the outside, especially when virtue and capability are spotty.
The wages, as they say, of missing the mark are death--in this case of marriages, families, and businesses. The panacea won't be found in the Gods of the Marketplace either, though it won't stop us following them down into terror and fire.
Why Christ came into the world keeps getting answered over and over again by the entropy of human nature.
As I've commented on many other similar articles and podcasts: The truth is that women (generally) will complain no matter what is happening. It's just like breathing to them. The internet has given them all a public forum in which to do this complaining so it's much more visible to the world now.
You hit the nail on the head with the force of a nuclear warhead. Despite that, I'll say I've had the opposite experience, that I have the much easier job working in an office, and being home with the kids is not easier to me. I chalk this up to the fact that I work at an engineering firm (so deliverables are almost always clearly defined) and culturally based in the Southern US so the hierarchy is well-defined but transparent (if VPs and C-suites aren't approachable and available, I'd quckly cease giving a fuck about anything from corporate). At least 80% of the time I'm responsible for meeting my own deadlines and deliverables with my team or pulling in other resources when needed.
But at home it's pure chaos sometimes, and honestly I'm not accustomed to it so it feels harder than it actually is.
I do think this points to the potential efficaciousness of a modern spin on the sword and shield style of relationship, perhaps a mother working in a corporate or healthcare job with a salary and health insurance, dad stays home with the kids and runs his own business.
Malcolm and Simone Collins at BasedCamp have said that women should get the steady W-2 and men the more risky ventures. While I find some of their thoughts out there, they may have been on to something there.
While reading I was thinking of that old timeless adage: "Bitches be Trippin"
Solid perspective, when it comes to elementary aged kids who are in school, or older kids who don't need as much hands-on attention. But the very tendency to rush through work to move onto relaxation time makes me skeptical that men are better suited to care for infants and small children at home.
This is the masculine perspective you describe, as I've seen it in action with small children:
- Showing an 18 month old how to put on his own clothes is tedious. Easier for me to just get him dressed; he'll learn when he's bigger.
- Allowing a 6 month old to start feeding herself creates huge messes. I'll just hold her hands down and put these solids straight into her mouth until her motor control improves.
- Potty training is horrible. I'll change his diapers until he's ready to use the toilet on his own.
- I already told my two year old that we'll go to the park after naptime. Why's he asking again? He will receive a verbal update when the status changes; I'm busy gaming.
Small kids require huge amounts of time investment, and you can't rush through some of these tasks without deleterious long-term consequences. Language development in particular seems to be excruciatingly painful to a man who dislikes constant interruptions and repetitions. If your toddler has extensive exposure to older, speaker humans, then it's not a huge deal. However, if the stay-at-home parent is the primary source of language development, then in this instance, women's neurotic tendencies (as you called them) are superior.
"Dads have it easier at home. Moms have it easier in the office."
Anything to break the relational bonds that keep human beings from evolving into industrial scale widgets. Consider digging into the educational project. Starting source: the book review of a (then) new ELA textbook by C.S. Lewis, and the history notes in The Yardsale of tge Mind Blog.
Practically, in the office men have both accountability and responsibility, women not so much. The reverse is true at home.
In both cases we lack virtuous male leadership, and capable female submission. Both are a lot harder from the inside than they look from the outside, especially when virtue and capability are spotty.
The wages, as they say, of missing the mark are death--in this case of marriages, families, and businesses. The panacea won't be found in the Gods of the Marketplace either, though it won't stop us following them down into terror and fire.
Why Christ came into the world keeps getting answered over and over again by the entropy of human nature.
As I've commented on many other similar articles and podcasts: The truth is that women (generally) will complain no matter what is happening. It's just like breathing to them. The internet has given them all a public forum in which to do this complaining so it's much more visible to the world now.
You hit the nail on the head with the force of a nuclear warhead. Despite that, I'll say I've had the opposite experience, that I have the much easier job working in an office, and being home with the kids is not easier to me. I chalk this up to the fact that I work at an engineering firm (so deliverables are almost always clearly defined) and culturally based in the Southern US so the hierarchy is well-defined but transparent (if VPs and C-suites aren't approachable and available, I'd quckly cease giving a fuck about anything from corporate). At least 80% of the time I'm responsible for meeting my own deadlines and deliverables with my team or pulling in other resources when needed.
But at home it's pure chaos sometimes, and honestly I'm not accustomed to it so it feels harder than it actually is.
“A colleague of mine explained once how it put him into an absolute rage watching how slowly his wife cut carrots.” Do we work together?
I do think this points to the potential efficaciousness of a modern spin on the sword and shield style of relationship, perhaps a mother working in a corporate or healthcare job with a salary and health insurance, dad stays home with the kids and runs his own business.
Malcolm and Simone Collins at BasedCamp have said that women should get the steady W-2 and men the more risky ventures. While I find some of their thoughts out there, they may have been on to something there.